Embracing Change: A Conversation with Jacquelyn Thompson

Are you ready for an emotional, life-changing journey? Brace yourselves as I, Jenelle Yarbrough, take you through a heart-to-heart with my inspiring sister, Jacquelyn Thompson. Jacquelyn, a certified family and personal life coach, has taken the road less traveled. From running a childcare business to becoming a life coach, her journey is nothing short of remarkable. Our conversation goes beyond the confines of business and explores the intricate corners of life, the profound impact of the pandemic, and the transformative power of change. 

Delve deeper into Jacquelyn's world with us as we navigate the challenges and rewards that come with embracing change. We take a closer look at her daily routine, which is a testament to her commitment to a balanced life. From meditation to exercise to soaking in vitamin D, Jacquelyn leaves no stone unturned in her pursuit of balance and self-discovery. You'll also get a glimpse into her latest venture, Living with Jacquelyn, which is a manifestation of her passion for helping others realize their life visions. This episode is packed with wisdom and life lessons that can serve as a compass in your own journey. 

As we traverse through the ups and downs of life, Jacquelyn opens up about the impact of the pandemic on her personally and professionally. The emotional toll of not being able to provide hands-on care to the families she had grown so close to was immense. But, Jacquelyn's resilience led her to pivot and grow into a higher level of her calling. We also shed light on the significance of daily practices in achieving a balanced life. It's not every day that you get to hear such an enlightening conversation filled with nuggets of wisdom. Tune in and get inspired by Jacquelyn's journey of transformation, resilience, and self-discovery.

Join the conversation!!

Transcript

Jenelle: 0:03

Hey y'all, I'm Jenelle Yarbrough, and welcome to Bloggers and Friends. This is your podcast for discussions around relevant topics and experiences that resonate with the culture. For those of you who roll with me, you know we talk a lot about embracing the possibility of change. We'll continue to touch on that and lots more Sound, good Work. Get into it. Hey. Hey, y'all Guess who's back? It's me, it's us, it's we, we're back. I hope everyone enjoyed their summer. I hope you were all able to rest, travel, brunch and day party your little hearts out.

Jenelle: 0:51

We are now into fall and for me I said for me the season that represents change the change in weather, the change in food, the change in wardrobe, the change in nature and the life changes we begin to project for ourselves in the new year to come. On this episode, we have a special guest that will be talking about her very own change of season and the beauty and the blessings that that new season bears. But first, before we dive into it, ain't nothing changed? Y'all know how we do. I want to shout out the locations that our listeners are tuning in from. Shout out to Boardman, oregon, Woodbury, minnesota, shenectity, new York, farmingdale, new York. All of Hearst, california, forest Park, georgia, chico, california, escondido, california and, last but not least, y'all. I want to send a special shout out to my folks in Canada who continue to show up really big for us. Shout out to Saskatoon, saskatchewan Correct me wherever I messed that up, we see you. To all of our listeners, new and returning, thank you for choosing to be here with us today. As usual, I am grateful Y'all.

Jenelle: 2:15

On today's episode, I'm joined by another one of my amazing sisters, Jacquelyn Thompson, who is a wife of 25 years, a mom of three, a Nani, aka a grandmother and an auntie to many. She has been serving her community by caring for families through her childcare business for over 20 years and she has recently elevated her business model to serving officially as a certified family, couples and personal life coach. In this episode we're going to chat about her journey, her evolving business and how she hopes this expanded and elevated method of service will further impact the lives of individuals, families and communities. I hope you all enjoy. Don't forget to hit us up on our social media spaces to let us know what you think.

Jenelle: 3:11

Here we go, hey, hey, everyone. We are happy to be here today and I always talk about my tribe y'all and I talk about my sisters all the time, and today you guys get to meet another one. Joining me today is my sister, Jacquelyn, aka Jack, aka Jacko. So you're going to have to forgive me for all the ways that you hear me refer to her today, but to y'all who ain't ever met her on these streets, she's Jacqueline. Yes, say the full name, say it with your chest and tell you no, otherwise she is Jacqueline to you, friends. So we're super excited to have her here today, and I know I use the word excited all the time, but anytime I get to share space with someone, it is very exciting for me. I enjoy hearing people's journey and this one is near dear and personal to and for me. And so welcome, sister. Thank you.

Jacquelyn: 4:24

Yes, I'm so excited.

Jenelle: 4:26

Yes. So you guys, today we're going to talk about this journey for my sister. She has been many things to many of people within our family, within this community, and she has gone through some changes personally and professionally over the last few years and we're going to explore that with her and what those changes have been, what that process was like for her, what newness she's come into and some of the things that keep her happy, healthy and thriving day to day. So you ready for this sister? Yes, yes. First of all, I wish I could have seen all the work that went into getting our lives together prior to actually pressing record Like I won't go into it but.

Jenelle: 5:19

I almost wish I was recording some of the buffoon.

Jacquelyn: 5:24

That's what I was saying. That would just be funny, just to see.

Jenelle: 5:28

Take me now. So let's take a trip down memory lane, because one of the things that came up for me was actually a specific memory that I've had and carried with me for years, a lifetime right. And then, I don't know, I feel like I had to be, or we had to be, maybe somewhere around seven, eight, whenever we had the what was the? What was the? What was the? It wasn't charming. We used to tuck our this T-shirt we have. What was that tissue called? It wasn't charming, I don't know. It had the little QP doll girl on it. I do not remember what it was.

Jenelle: 6:16

I don't remember, but y'all listen. We would tuck this little T-shirt into our drawers and we would put our hands in our hips and we would sing you are my sunshine, honey, I don't know why. Together.

Jacquelyn: 6:27

Together.

Jenelle: 6:28

I don't even know where it came from or how we got there. It was somewhere around in those years. No, that's a lie. That is a lie. I'm going to tell you why it's a lie Now that I'm thinking deeper about it, because it's the same door that the song singing used to happen, but picturing you. You were much older, so it could not have been when we were seven or eight. It had to be when maybe I was like 10 and you maybe were like 12, you were in middle school. Anywho. Anywho, we get my, my, my memories together. But Carrie, our cousin Carrie, we were standing in the doorway of the room on on the main floor. She asked you what you want to do when you grow up, and what do you? What do you want to do when you grow up? What do you want to be in life? And you said I want to have my own childcare. Do you remember that?

Jacquelyn: 7:23

Listen, I do not, I do not.

Jenelle: 7:25

You were sitting on the bed and me and Carrie were in the door because you know, I was glued to her hip and we were standing in that doorway. She asked you what you want to be and and and what you want to do, and you said you want to own your own childcare and she said good, you will.

Jacquelyn: 7:40

Yes.

Jenelle: 7:41

Yeah.

Jacquelyn: 7:42

Listen, that stuck with me somewhere in here.

Jenelle: 7:46

Yes, right. And so years later you did. And that's kind of where where this whole story, where I kind of want to pick up from what at a young age said this is what I want to do in my, in my adult life.

Jacquelyn: 8:04

You know, I think that it was really. It started extremely early for me. I would really say it started forming when I was in kindergarten or first grade, being in school. You know how we were taught Ask questions If it doesn't sound right. If it doesn't feel right, ask some more questions. Don't just fall for what somebody tells you. Dig a little bit deeper. And I just remember being in school wondering why are these adults Telling us we have to conform to all of these requirements? And we're all individuals. We're not going to all think the same, feel the same, need the same things. So I just would sit while I enjoyed my early education, I just thought that it should feel different and the kids should not feel like we have to be forced into a box. And that's kind of what I was feeling is. I knew I didn't learn the same way that other kids learned or at least that's what I felt like then.

Jacquelyn: 9:22

I'm sure there were tons of other kids that felt the same way and that's what I started realizing being able to have that empathy for others to say we should not be forced, and so I really started creating a clear vision of what my school would look like.

Jenelle: 9:45

She better.

Jacquelyn: 9:46

My school would look like and I subjected you all to that. Sometimes when we played school, I got to boss everybody around, but being able to Were we just playing when that happened, yes, yes, when we were being bossed around Both here, good, good, good.

Jacquelyn: 10:09

But, yeah, being able to have that vision really early and want all kids to feel accepted and that there was a place for each of us and that, who we are, we should be okay with. It doesn't mean don't strive to learn or push yourself, of course, but not fearing being in trouble or being sent to be a classroom. That was for the other kids. I, oh, that was like the most cruelest, cruelest thing to me. So it just really started forming a vision for me to say that I wanted all kids to be able to feel empowered, to be able to be just who they are and be able to receive the support that they need in order to get to the places that they are wanting to be and also needing to be. So I know what those places are, but being able to push to be able to do that. So, yeah, that started very, very early for me, then just continued on.

Jenelle: 11:19

So, listeners, it's funny because I always and I think we just kind of talked about this a little while ago that I think of you as the middle child of the family and you're not but, but, but, so, so, but your presence and the role in our family feels very much like the center, neutral role, and so I always think of you like a I don't even know why like I think because you're the middle girl but you're not the middle child. It's really interesting, but your conversation was funny.

Jenelle: 12:06

Yeah, but your role is definitely the center of this family, like every family has their dynamics and the roles, and so I think about like you played this, this nurturing, otherly role, right, and even now still in life. You're so very thoughtful about thinking who each of us are as a person, right, and when I think about how that carried over into the work that you do, I think about all of the littles and just their unique personalities and ways and how you were so thoughtful and artful about meeting them all where they were at, within the same overall right, the efforts and projects and schoolwork, and you know all of the things. You challenge them all in the same way, even if it was through a different method, right. And the other part of that is that I want to acknowledge because it'll lead into the future. I mean, you know the conversation that follows is the parents were very much a part of that work, right, absolutely Like the work that you were doing, and I think that we wish that we were able to have the intimate relationships with our children's school teachers that you had, with the parents of the children that you cared for and taught and educated, and I think that was just so special, you guys.

Jenelle: 13:53

Let me just say I was a young mother, my child. I can't fathom her having a different experience than what she had. My first one, right, and then the second one came and she was able to have the same experience and just the thoughtfulness and care and protection and safety, and in knowing that she was in a safe space, her mind and her body were safe, her thoughts and opinions were safe, her development and curiosities were safe. That was the first one, and then the second one, which had a very different personality than the first one, and all of the same things. All of those same things were safe. Feedback that came to me was given with love and given in partnership and collaboration, and so I just think that what you provided it meant everything to me as a mother who's handing over my children to someone.

Jacquelyn: 15:04

I recognize that, then I don't even think it was a conscious awareness of recognizing that it's a natural thing, that if I am having the privilege of being able to have your children here with me, you are entrusting me with these beautiful and amazing little souls and I am going to have such an influence that I just recognized every bit of that.

Jenelle: 15:38

I say all of that to more or less talk about that relationship, that partnership that existed between you and parents in focusing on developing that child. And I think that you know for me, as a young mother who didn't have tons of money right and knowing that what I could afford did not compromise they care that my children received, that meant everything, everything to me, everything to me, and I think that you know just the way that you have served families over the years has just been something incredible and selfless to watch. And so I'm not just saying this because you're my sister, I'm also saying it because I was a parent right In that process, and so I feel like I can say that. So fast forward a little bit, right. Pandemic kids Boom. Everyone's world turns upside down. Yes, how did that affect you? You personally and professionally, with your business that is, a hands on kids present business. What did that mean for you?

Jacquelyn: 17:07

That is it's still, you know, can give me a little emotional. Today I told myself I wasn't going to cry. I want to do that. Oh goodness, I have. I mean, for 20 plus years is what I have. It's not just what I have done or what I have participated in. Yeah.

Jacquelyn: 17:34

It was the families that I got to work with. We all were family. That's just the environment that we created. Yes, we functioned together. We, if we're having a barbecue right, holidays were a year for the July. We're outside. We're outside, we're doing stuff together.

Jacquelyn: 18:02

And it is. We were just so intertwined, everything it was all of us, and so it, personally and professionally, kind of just blew up my, my world for a lack of a better term, I probably shouldn't use that, but it just it. Completely mentally, it was extremely challenging it was. Initially I didn't quite understand how mentally challenging it was because I was busy creating new alternatives for the time being.

Jacquelyn: 18:49

Let's make it through and in my head it was temporary. It was, you know, okay, so it's still, you know, really bad, okay, well, families, let's do this and that until we can figure something else out. And you're turning into, it's turning into months. We hit a year mark and I'm like um am I having to really make some decisions here. In my head I'm still thinking oh, I'll get back to full function, flow and families running through here and the same as before in it, and you know we're hearing new numbers.

Jacquelyn: 19:34

At that point in time, yeah, my brain just wouldn't take it all in because I was so focused that I was going to get back to servicing these families, caring for these families, the same as it's been for 20 plus years, yeah. So it took me a while to get to a point of understanding that I was needing to start thinking of some other things and really it really required me to go through a grieving process that I just didn't know I needed to go through. Pardon me.

Jacquelyn: 20:11

So, with that, recognizing I needed to go through that process was one thing, going through it whole another. Okay, I don't want to go through the feelings and the emotions and it would really hit really extreme some days if I'm, you know, trying to work, you know pay attention to it. So I was very blessed for the way that we were able to set up during the pandemic, when it was I. You know I hate using that term of during the pandemic because people are still so affected by it.

Jacquelyn: 20:49

Yeah, yeah, early on, but being able to have that setup of having the support. Yeah. Having someone in my space just to talk, to chat with, and not necessarily about even business, yeah, yeah, just be able to just throw some things out there. Anyhow, our setup during those early years of the pandemic was very helpful.

Jenelle: 21:20

Can we just pause there? The early years, yeah, the like, the early years, can we just? Can we just pause and just think about that, right, like, and I, and I feel what you're saying about saying like in the pandemic, because there's people who are still affected by it, very true, but I think we're on the other side of the worst and and now we're in the years of how do we manage it and still carry on with life. But but the years, y'all like the years when we talk about the value of time, right, like years and I know everybody lived through that time differently.

Jenelle: 22:04

Zero judgment over here, but you know you guys have heard me talk about it before. We were on a serious lockdown so that we could protect that space and environment to be with each other and be each other's social life. Essentially through that we made it happen. We did make it happen.

Jacquelyn: 22:23

Games where you know come on, come on.

Jenelle: 22:27

Y'all see like tables of food for no reason, just to. But that time was very real and I think that so many people were challenged in that time to think about what does life mean to me, given what we know right now, like how and I don't think that anybody didn't know how fragile life was, but how not in control you are of the world, right, and that we can come into these experiences that challenge our, challenge the way we live, challenge the way we think, challenge our hearts and minds spiritually, and so you know, this was very. This was a time where you're having to figure out what. What does life look like for me moving forward, right, like how do I?

Jenelle: 23:28

And again that we're grieving yeah, I look to have an episode on this because I think it's so important to think of all of the things that we have to say goodbye to, all of the things that we lose. That's outside of our control, whether that is, you know, professional spaces, lives, you know, parts of yourself, partners in life all of those things require a grieving process. But you hit this space where you start turning the page for yourself, right, what is going through your mind, what's going on in your heart that's saying it's time.

Jacquelyn: 24:04

So I will say that before we were even faced with the pandemic, probably about six months before, I had already started seeing something a little different for my child care business and it seems so funny calling it business, it's just it was family, but I am. I was in the space of watching parents coming in and having certain questions about their life and their experiences in life and then and and work and partnership with their significant other or co-parenting and these kinds of things, and something just hit me. It wasn't like I hadn't been seeing or hearing that before, but something had just hit me and one day and was just like it would be nice if I could be able to set some things up with the parents. Now I'm I'm in my late 40s.

Jenelle: 25:13

Come on, we're married for 20 plus years.

Jacquelyn: 25:19

My children were grown, I was getting into this empty nest space and so I experienced a whole lot. I know. I know I experienced a whole lot of things in my life and and watching them come in and some younger families come in, younger relationships come in, I was just like I can be more support than just working with the children and having them yeah, you know move into life. But while I've always felt like I supported the family as a whole, there was some opportunity to do it even on a more, more rounded scale, and so I was already in the process of figuring out how to work some things in there, just gradually, nonchalantly type, and so it wasn't really a big deal, just another part of what we do here. Yeah.

Jacquelyn: 26:18

And so I had said a time for myself that, oh, in January 20, 20 hits, then I'll, you know, start implementing a few things. And da, da, da, and it was, I want to say, november of 19. We already started dealing with some very interesting sickness, and we don't normally have that here. Yeah.

Jacquelyn: 26:47

Yeah, so it it started making things a little bit different here of having to, you know, slow down a little bit with the what we were able to do for a moment. There was some small shutdowns here because it was not anything that I wanted the kids having to deal with Trying to make sure everybody is staying healthy and that we were able to clear the space.

Jenelle: 27:19

Oh, you mean like being a good neighbor. You mean like considering other people and not making selfish decisions. You mean like not going around people sick. You mean like not bringing your kids around people sick to make others sick. You mean that? Huh, that is. That is interesting how that works.

Jacquelyn: 27:41

Yes, so part being able to to make sure that we were all being able to still continue to function and everybody wasn't sitting home sick the whole time, but but being able to to set some good boundaries and make sure that, if kids were being affected by whatever the illness was that was going around at that point in time, that it was. Let's give this a moment to be able to clear up and we can. We can move forward a little bit better. But this went on for a few months yeah, a few months and again it slowed down what I was intending to begin in January of 2020. And so I did not have the opportunity to implement much of it at all. So when we did shut down, it still didn't click to me that right away that I can go ahead and start this up again. We're in a space that we have no idea what it looked at. Yeah.

Jacquelyn: 28:50

So, um it, it's a finally hit me that I can just move forward with this part, yeah, even though it was not the way that I envisioned it initially.

Jenelle: 29:08

But then God said hey girl, you think that you always have planned out?

Jacquelyn: 29:13

and that you're ready for all things and that you've got control over this, and the answer was no.

Jenelle: 29:21

The answer was no, ma'am, you sit down, I got this plan for you. Yes, and listen, you're gonna follow suit you may not have known it for yourself.

Jacquelyn: 29:31

Sit back and watch girl how I do that, and that's exactly what I had to do, because every time, yeah, every time, I said, oh, I know, oh, I know, even though I was praying on it. Yeah, I was absolutely praying on it. I was praying on it with a rush on. Yeah, now let me know what it is, and I should know, I should know, I should know. It should be very easy for me to that kind of thing, and so being able to sit in the stillness.

Jenelle: 30:10

Girl and wait for the reveal.

Jacquelyn: 30:13

Shut the mouth. If I ask it, I will receive it. It just may not look like Well come on Nith, come on Nith. Yeah, I told him I was ready for whatever it was that he saw, so he sits down sits.

Jenelle: 30:37

Still have all the seats. Ma'am, Wait for this, goodness.

Jacquelyn: 30:41

The Lord said let it cook, that's what I had to do and there was a lot of change in there. There was a lot of change in there Personally having to learn new things about myself and I'll change that word from having to having the opportunity to learn some things about myself. But because I was in my regular motion every single day up until then my regular motion I was comfortable. I was, of course, there was things here and there that I would see I can adjust, I can change, I need to move towards all that kind of stuff, but I haven't been pressed to learn myself to this degree, for I don't know, so that was just a privilege all on its own. Yeah.

Jenelle: 31:53

That's the thing about change, though right, and listeners be quiet you already know it's coming right, like the change. It challenges you, it stretches you, it makes you uncomfortable and it's like. I remember I did an episode one time kind of just creating this analogy around change right, it's like you're going through this uncomfortable phase and as soon as you get to a place where you feel like you can't take it anymore, it's the submission, like submitting to, and it was I compared it to and you were with me for both of these, right, but natural childbirth, right, like right. Remember I went into both of them like no, gonna do it natural. The first one, you know there was a different set of issues with, but the second one, y'all my good sis here, honey, she was walking me around, sitting me on this ball, hearing me fuss and cuss. We were trying to make it happen.

Jenelle: 33:02

Oh my gosh. And again for anybody who hasn't listened to that episode, essentially what it was is right. We went through hours of this because I had to be induced. I'll speak about the second one, because the first one was similar but there was a lot of different complications also. But for this one it was like you know, hours of like working through it and she's always, she's so gentle y'all I like to say I'm gentle. My children tell me I'm not. I am gentle in ways. I have a gentle heart.

Jacquelyn: 33:38

But I do have a gentle heart. Yes, you do. You have a gentle heart, I do, it's fair.

Jenelle: 33:46

But you know, she's just so nurturing and gentle, and so she's coaching me through this process, essentially of what I'm feeling, what I'm going through, like trying to get me comfortable, trying to keep my mind right, like like keep my mind on the objective and not be distracted, and like keep the focus of just like you can process what you're feeling. You can process what you're feeling like Anywho walking through it. But as soon as I thought I couldn't take it anymore, right, I'm like skip, it Ain't no reason to be in this level of pain Epidural. Then I was like I feel like I got to use the bathroom and they're like you got to use the bathroom. And I'm like, yeah, this is before. They didn't, they didn't have the chance to give me the epidural right, and they're like let me check you really quick, check me. Oh, here she goes, she's ready, I feel hair Right.

Jenelle: 34:43

And so I use that analogy just to say, as soon as I felt like I couldn't take it anymore, it was time, right, and here comes the blessing. And so I think that that that that makes me think of the change process is like you're stretched, you're uncomfortable, you're being pulled in these areas that are so unfamiliar and it feels so taxing mentally, um, um, because you're, you're discovering new parts of yourself, because you're being pushed further in the knowing of yourself than than you, than you had had to go before. And it's that self discovery right. And as soon as you feel like er, the guy says here's the blessing See, you got this, you got this, and, and that's how I think about it. And so any who that I, just any who it's that. It's that change though, that that that I think people that discomfort in that change, that that makes people so afraid and anxious to go through that process.

Jacquelyn: 35:49

Mm, hmm, the lack of when you feel like there's a lack of control, um, and you, for me, I don't think that there, that I was, um, that I was in that part of the space of the lack of control. With that, I think that it was me wanting answers, yeah, so I guess that may be control Me wanting answers Needing to know.

Jenelle: 36:21

I need to know, yeah, yeah.

Jacquelyn: 36:25

And and being able to see the results of whatever it was that I was doing or thinking, or you know, am I being able to progress? Um, let me just be very clear. I am continuing to be in this space of loving, um, what I am getting to explore about myself. Mm, hmm. Um, it is amazing.

Jenelle: 36:51

I'll just say it is amazing no need to dig for the word when it's right there. It's amazing, damn it.

Jacquelyn: 36:59

It is just being able to uh, but being able to be open about my exploration, about myself and and I'm still me, I am still who I've always been. There's just so much more that I am that I am getting familiar with. Um and uh. Yeah, it's just. It is an awesome feeling at this age in space being able to learn so many new things about yourself.

Jenelle: 37:32

Come on, cause, listen, I say this all the time Like people when my birthday rolls around and they're like how old are you? You're going to be 20 something.

Jacquelyn: 37:40

Ha, ha ha ha, I am proud of myself already 25 again.

Jenelle: 37:42

No ma'am you give me all my years, I mean I earned all of these things and I love it here, like I love it here, hey y'all 30 somethings, 20 somethings, 20 somethings, 40 somethings is old and something Right Like like ma'am.

Jacquelyn: 38:01

Oh, this is my best space, ma'am. It is my absolute best space. And I will be honest and saying I felt, even before my transition into this, I still was feeling like this is amazing space. Yes, I was getting to create every bit of what that was. I was, I was open to every bit of the changes that I was going through then in my life, transitioning in such a massive way, in such a short, quick amount of time. Then there's a lot of other things that you're forced to, to recognize and to see and to, I don't know, deal with.

Jenelle: 38:51

Yeah, but so did that. Yep, did it. Yeah, came, came through kicking down doors. Y'all in. My sister has a new business, me too, I too.

Jacquelyn: 39:07

I too, tell us about that. I am so excited about this. I have been Happy hands, happy hands, mm-hmm. I was trying not. They're literally sitting down underneath my.

Jenelle: 39:22

These ryan teal hands, these blades don't move.

Jacquelyn: 39:26

They're literally tucked away. So I don't just start, yeah, but yes, I am in again such a privileged place of people entrusting me with some of the most intimate spaces of their life. I am getting to partner with people to who want to make changes in their life Mm-hmm and just need that extra support, yeah, and extra ear and some help planning and organizing and helping them prioritize throughout their journey getting to that vision that they see for themselves. So it's so exciting, it's so exciting, it's so fun. It has been an amazing, amazing experience for me.

Jenelle: 40:27

Sometimes it's just about like like accountability systems, right, like you have it in your head, yeah, the things that you want for your life, the way that you envision living your life. But applying those things and making them happen can be challenging sometimes, when sometimes you might lack in the accountability system.

Jenelle: 40:50

Sometimes you might lack the capacity, and what I mean by capacity is our life is so filled with so many other things, that's not that you're not capable, it's having the capacity to help plan the next steps or plan the things that are necessary to move your life in the direction that you want it. I remember I wanted to write more. For folks who know me, you know I love to write, whether that's journaling, whether that is poetry, whether that is just random thoughts, whatever right. And I had dinner one time with one of my mentors and a teacher who listens she's a writer. Die because she's been there for many of young people.

Jacquelyn: 41:41

Hold on which I was so jealous. I was very jealous that I did not have the opportunity to experience this said teacher, who, everyone, everyone I had never met one person. Now, my sisters and brothers, y'all all got to experience. I did not, and not because of the teacher, it was me and where I was in that time, I'm sure. But yeah, I just need to throw it out there that I did not get this amazing experience.

Jenelle: 42:21

Well, she's amazing. Shout out to Linda May Christensen. Okay, and you know, she she's connected to many of her former students still to this day. I am one of them that I look to her if I write something that I really feel like emotionally connected to, and it's been a while since I've done that, but I'll send it over to her so she can give me feedback. Anywho, I was telling her I wanted to write more and in this dinner, and she was like kind of like, well, what's stopping you, you know? And I was like, oh, you know, had these reasons in my head and she said, oh, you need an assignment. Yes.

Jenelle: 43:00

You need an assignment. You need an. This is why I love her, though, right, because she, she knows who you are. She, she, she, like, she knows and remembers who you are, even as you've evolved. Right, she understands what lives in you, but also understands, you know, you truly connects, yeah, and you've grown up and you know, but she knows. And so she heard in that moment like mm-hmm, mm-hmm, and she said you don't have the capacity right to determine what comes next in this step of writing more. You need an assignment, and I was like buzz her heart Like.

Jacquelyn: 43:39

I love her so much.

Jenelle: 43:41

Like I love her so much. But I think that that is some, not this. That is a small piece of what you do, but I think that's part of it, for people is sometimes people just that accountability system, that assignment, and so talk about, talk about what you offer and and who we talking? Families, are we talking? Individuals Are we talking to? Are we talking couples? Are we talking to tell? Tell girls help, we're talking all of that.

Jacquelyn: 44:13

We are talking all of that In order to for a family to be strong and moving towards the same vision, then the individuals in the family also need to be able to be putting in the I don't like using the word work, but it does come out so automatically. Yeah, yeah. So putting in that effort, yeah, putting in that effort to make the necessary changes or adjustments that are needed.

Jenelle: 44:51

So maybe acknowledgement and effort, because we have to acknowledge that there is work to do right, and then that knowledge, accountability and effort.

Jacquelyn: 45:02

Are you willing to be able to put that work in for what it is that you want, for yourself or for your family? Come on, for your relationship. Come on and trust me, every bit of that is something I have had to ask myself numerous times. With three kids, all of my bonuses? Yes, and it is a it has. Well, I know the challenges with that.

Jacquelyn: 45:44

I have a lot of empathy and compassion for others, as they are recognizing that they are. Maybe they could be struggling with figuring it out. They could be just seeing something and saying, hey, yeah, I'm going to need a little bit of direction. Yeah, or that whole. I don't necessarily have the time for all of the thinking part of this. What could a good plan look like for me? If this is my life, this is my lifestyle, this is how my world looks. What kind of plan can we put together to be able to help me get to where it is that I'm trying to get to? And it requires a lot of openness and honesty and conversation and then that effort on a consistent basis. But, yeah, couples, individuals, families, I work with them all.

Jenelle: 46:56

Yes, and we should note that this is not in replacement of therapy. Sorry, I needed to say that loud and loud.

Jacquelyn: 47:05

Loud and clear. Let me get closer to the microphone, loud and clear into the mic. No, mine is strictly just for the planning of the organizational part of your life in space, being able to assist you with organizing, being creative, being able to be creative with some new ideas and new thoughts and new techniques and tactics, if you want to call them that. I like to call them techniques, yeah, to be able to utilize and implement in your space, in your life, the change you hope to affect in people's lives.

Jacquelyn: 47:50

My hope is is with the connections that I make with these individuals and couples, families and whatnot that that they are able to this word often gets overused, but follow me that they feel empowered, but they're feeling empowered to create a vision and change that vision. As we grow, as we learn ourselves, as we are gaining new feelings, new thoughts, new experiences, but feeling empowered that that you have that ability, you have that here at all times.

Jacquelyn: 48:44

it's about being able to uncover that, and I know it can sound frustrating to people when people tell them that it's like no, just tell me how to get there. Everybody's journey is different. Everybody's journey looks different, feels different, and it is again. The effort that we're putting in is going to allow us to have the better experience through that process. So I just hope for me.

Jenelle: 49:18

I hope that I'm able to continue to encourage that, and so I don't know if we failed to say it, but I'm sitting here trying to remember. Did we ever say living with Jacqueline? Living with Jacqueline is is, is the business name? Yeah, living with Jacqueline, and tell them how to find you, reach you, and then what? The process is right. Because here's what I imagine. This is what Janelle imagines. Yes not Jacqueline.

Jenelle: 49:55

Okay, yes, I imagine that because you are so like intertwined on a community level and you know so many people and everyone. Yeah, my sister established a waitlist for her child, right, like there were people who were constantly checking in, like hoping to get their their, their little people in with Listen. I was so glad, I know.

Jacquelyn: 50:21

I know like it was amazing families.

Jenelle: 50:24

It's like they kept having kids and and one of your children went, like you want all of your children to have that experience, right. But so what I imagine is that there's probably people that would try to reach out to you outside of the process. So so what I want to encourage people to do, as her sister, is this is understand. This is a business right, and this is a beautiful thing that she has designed to continue the work that she was doing in a new way, on a larger scale, and that we should all, when desiring those services, value and respect it in a way that says we need to go through the proper channels and do the proper things and not try to get this goodness on the side, right. And so I'm going to ask my sister here To explain the process, and then I need all of you beautiful people to understand and respect the process and abide by the process.

Jenelle: 51:46

He is so open and beautiful and nice and generous and kind. That is not a reason for you to bypass process because she is so open and accessible. I'm saying that for her. Okay, as her sister, I would appreciate that you act accordingly. Okay, we all know she's wonderful. We all know she's a blessing to many and all. Okay, so please handle her with care. That is her sister. Now I'm going to get out of the way and I'm going to let my sister talk about this process that y'all need to write down, Remember. Take a picture of it.

Jacquelyn: 52:36

And it's actually very, very, very. The process part is the simple part. Wonderful, yes, and the process is individuals understanding that they deserve this process, families understanding that you deserve being to be able to go through the process. Process is pretty simple. You are able to go to my website and you can go to my website with Jacquelinecom. Well, and I'll say you younger, younger ones have zero idea.

Jenelle: 53:22

Yeah, I don't know what that is, but that's how I learned how to spell my name and that's how we learned how to spell her name to the Mickey Mouse song.

Jacquelyn: 53:28

For those of y'all who have zero reference here you can go to my website, living with Jacquelinecom and, pretty simple. There is a book button and you can get book an appointment, a free consultation, so we can chat a little bit, see what it is that, what changes it is that you're wanting to be making your life or your family's life for with your partner, and then make sure that you know we are for each other, because I mean, you know great, as they think my services are and I am then you know everybody, we're all different, so I just wanted to make sure that we are a good match and that it is something that I am able to assist you with. And, yeah, book the free consultation and now look at that y'all it is.

Jenelle: 54:31

he's making it easy for y'all. Book the free. Oh yes, consultation, yes, book the free, free consultations, just 30 minutes book.

Jacquelyn: 54:43

Book it press book. Choose your date, Choose your time. Tell me your name. And how I can contact you.

Jenelle: 54:53

Did you hear the simplicity there? It's very, very key is booking. Yes, you booked the 30 minute consult. You can ask the questions you need to ask. She can ask the questions she needs to ask is free. It's don't send her no text. Don't send her no DM. Don't stop her on the street. Don't bother her at dinner. This is her sister, okay, okay, I'm this ain't her. This is her sister because I just know people. Okay, would y'all protect my sister please? I love it. Book, book. Take your Twitter fingers, go to the website, type in those numbers Book the 30 minute consult. Yes, oh, free for free.

Jacquelyn: 55:49

Yes, yes.

Jenelle: 55:52

And then you can decide if this is something for you. Absolutely, you can decide if this is something that she feels would work for you. If this would be a collaboration, that would be right. So we're talking. I mean, you know, you might call it a life coach or a life collaborator, I don't know, ain't he? What's your preference here?

Jacquelyn: 56:11

It's very funny, as much as I don't necessarily like the term life coach, because I think that that's people don't necessarily know what that means, but it is really being able to collaborate, being able to do this together. Make sure that it is. I mean, it's tailored to you. That's the deal. It is tailored to you. You get a plan that is specific to your needs, yeah, and and then I am there with you throughout your process. I have different packages. We can do three months, which is usually about 12 individual one hour sessions. So you do one hour once a week and usually like to start off at that three month mark because you want to be able to set the plan and get into the process and be able to start seeing some significant change and be able to start maintaining that change. But there's three months, six months, we 12 months and, yeah, get us being in this in a new space, yeah, feeling different.

Jacquelyn: 57:34

Yeah, you know, able to achieve some things. It's from empty nesters trying to figure out what the heck is my life. But I've had kids for all this time and I'm looking around and I'm saying hold on, there's me, there's me.

Jenelle: 57:54

I remember what was that? The episode that I did with the. It was Latia and Chanel, and you know they are younger, beautiful, successful, young women who who are married and and you know they were talking about their experiences and you know perception of married, all of the things right. But one of the points that we talked about in that episode was like I think it was Chanel and she was like I take my husband his plate first and everyone's like you feed your kids first. She's like I feed my husband first, Right, and so I think just, even even in that space I mean that's an example of like, a mindset right of like I'm taking care of my marriage first because if we're good, our kids are going to be foundation Right.

Jenelle: 58:45

And being able to like, just even shift some mindsets and I don't want to go into particulars, I'll stop from that about, like you know, what you know people might explore with you. But I think the point is, is that there there are such a range of things. Everyone's life is unique. Everyone is at a different space, at a different place. What a person might be looking to or needing to achieve in you know, in short term, or and or long term, it's different, and I think that is the point determining that for yourself, not not against compared to somebody else, but for you, and and and the life you want to live. Is that how it said? Ain't it Is that? Oh? So, for those that don't know, this is my sister back caller. Ain't he? Oh, yeah, because me and I don't want anybody to be confused, and that's partially because of all of the littles. Yes, we call each other. We have cousins that call us. Ain't we do just? Yes, it's very confusing when you're in the middle of it.

Jacquelyn: 59:56

Yes, people do Wait. The question is always posed, however, yes, and that can be very confusing.

Jenelle: 1:00:05

We have cousins that call us. Ain't our cousins kids that call us? Ain't he yes, or ain't he our uncles? And the I mean the uncles are the same way. It's just, it's a family thing. Forgive us, but don't be confused in this conversation. This is my sister. Yes, I call her, ain't he also? I don't even remember what I was saying before that, but I felt like I need to clarify that before. People were like what is going on? Anywho, one of the things that I want to make sure that we talk about before this goes and gets even more long winded here is y'all know what I'm capable of I'm going to say you can't get both of us together and think I've been mid sentence and been like OK, zip it for a second.

Jenelle: 1:00:49

And listen. It's real, because this is like sister chat for us and y'all just happen to be listening and trying to throw some things out there for y'all. But Keep me on track. I want to talk about some of your daily practices and I talk about how I'm super routine and how you know there's things that, for me, I have to I execute in this order, and this is for me and this is for what keeps my mind in my, you know, my, my heart, my spirit. All of those things aligned are these things, and I think that we're in two very different fields, but a lot of what we both do is is serving other people, the exchange of energy, pouring into and being a resource to other people, and but I do want to say that, in that there is this like there's this exchange, right, we are also gaining something from.

Jenelle: 1:02:04

The work that we're learning about other people, we're learning about ourselves, we're learning about right. So it is an even exchange and and also the feeling that you get it. That in itself is a blessing, when you know you are giving of yourself to someone else. So I want to say that, so I'm not trying to sound like All of this giving like some dramatic thing but my point is is that it takes a lot from you when you are doing it from the right place right and and and so I want you to talk to the people About some of your, some of a routine job I really want for myself I just have not gained the discipline for them yet, but is that

Jenelle: 1:02:48

girl I. I have small moments of meditation in the morning. You're a really good facilitator of like longer meditation. You have a regular workout schedule. We know that that has been a joke for me. Okay, let's Post pandemic during the pandemic right. Like that has been a joke for me and again in previous episodes I could hear when she bought me workout stuff for my birthday.

Jacquelyn: 1:03:21

Like she's gonna work out girl. She did say. She said and I wanted to help, assist, encourage Workout job. Yes, if you're gonna do it, let's do it.

Jenelle: 1:03:34

But that right Some of even in getting your vitamin D, getting outside, even when it's cold, but getting outside I mean, you know what I mean Like you have very intentional practices daily that I think are very important.

Jenelle: 1:03:52

I think it's important for anybody to have a routine right, but you know, in clearing out the space that you need to clear to be available to other people, those daily routines are just so important. So talk about some of your daily practices. Take us through no seriously like what's important to you to make sure that you do every day right In order to be who you need to be to other people in this work, and just every day right and for myself.

Jacquelyn: 1:04:28

It is something that really started a long time ago. I was not always good with it in my early parenting years, caught up in the shuffle and all that Didn't even understand where I was supposed to put anytime from me, and so I'll spare the whole story. I mean the story that was about to come out of my mouth, you see it.

Jenelle: 1:04:52

It did so well for yourself. You wanna tell the story? I didn't get it. It didn't get visual, it just didn't meet.

Jacquelyn: 1:04:59

But yeah, usually my days consist Every day my morning starts off with my morning prayer and I also have a gratitude list, usually three to five things that I am grateful for. I find that that's really important. I find prayer and the gratitude list is extremely important. But knowing being able to verbalize, vocalize the things that I am grateful for, just picking out a couple Every day, that's always. It keeps me kind of present and appreciative, I feel. And meditation, that is listen, that thing. There there's nothing like prayer. Don't ever get me wrong. Very, yeah, to differate things, one does not replace the other At all. Meditation is about me centering.

Jacquelyn: 1:06:17

Me Of me connecting with me. Yeah. It allows me to center myself, it allows me to really have a sense of focus, a sense of peace. Yeah. And a sense of calm. I can be more on the high energy. As quiet as I can be, I can be on the high energy side, and so that meditation has been a life changer, and I did start out with just five minutes a day when I very first started.

Jenelle: 1:06:59

I was gonna ask that because it's a growth. Meditation is a growth process, Like I remember. Do you remember this? And I was like I tried to meditate today and then I woke up. Yes, yeah, I was sitting. I didn't sit on the floor, I was sitting on my couch and there's not any specific. I mean, people may have best practices and what works best, but I was like I'm gonna just fold up my legs here, I'm gonna cross them, I'm gonna sit up and I'm gonna just on my couch, I'm just gonna close my eyes and meditate. Ciao. And I woke up.

Jacquelyn: 1:07:32

I fell asleep. She can fall asleep anywhere I can I can. So that's almost not fair. But However, however, meditation there you will hear people say that. You will absolutely hear people say that I learned very early that I had to be initially uncomfortable. As we go back to that, yeah, yeah, I had to be uncomfortable in order to get comfortable in the meditation space. I had to push myself through the jitters, I had to push myself through the oh wait, am I dozing off? But that also meant that I was gaining more focus here, that I was getting more center here. I can't doze off if I am connected here and so, yes, that is, if I meditate 10 minutes or if I meditate 30 minutes, it is all what my body is feeling like it's needing and what's how I'm connecting with it. As to how I do that, but meditation is in my daily practice. It is several times a day. Yeah, it is several times a day, small little chunks throughout the day.

Jacquelyn: 1:08:55

Again, my body kind of runs a little bit more high energy, the thoughts are going on a regular and creativity Words are there. So being able to sit and do that five quick minutes, see, this is why I believe in and we will not go down this rabbit hole.

Jenelle: 1:09:17

But this is why I also believe in meditation in schools and I think of this as a way to get into meditation and think of this, like I watched some of the experiments happening where people are for younger children and I don't think that there's an age limit on it in the school design that when they're struggling in the class, they can go to a meditation session Versus if someone misbehaved, instead of going and being reprimanded like if someone's misbehaving there's likely a reason. And in teaching here's the thing, y'all, here's the thing coping right, how to manage the way that they are feeling, whatever's causing them to act out, whatever is causing this challenge. Or like teaching them how to cope with it. Like what tools? Okay, no, I said I wasn't going to do it.

Jenelle: 1:10:15

I'm not going to do it but I believe it in the schools and I believe that for adults also, who are learning how to make decisions or learning how to respond in a non-emotional way, right that you're taking the opportunity to recalibrate throughout the day and I don't meditate throughout the day like my sister does, but I will time out and I will like turn my chair towards the window when I'm at work and I'll look out the window and just breathe and just like appreciate it If it's cold outside but the sun is shining through warm, I'm sitting there in that sun.

Jenelle: 1:11:00

And I'm right, like it's the awareness right yeah, anywho, I won't take us down a whole opposite direction, but and and those are all great things we saw. My sister is posting content these days and y'all got a glimpse of her workout room.

Jacquelyn: 1:11:19

Oh.

Jenelle: 1:11:21

Follow her on IG.

Jacquelyn: 1:11:23

Okay, yes, I am on IG, living with Jacqueline on IG, and yes, that see, this is why I say I could have went on and on and on. That was a whole change and a whole challenge for me of exposure. Another story another time. But yes, I do have a little workout room, but I it's cute, y'all it's cute Bunch of different stuff. But, yeah, I get to do my yoga. I really do enjoy yoga. I switch up my workouts during the week. Yeah, running Love it. I do love running Jiu-jitsu. I do love my jiu-jitsu. I'm gonna kick my ass.

Jenelle: 1:12:08

My sister is a lethal weapon. Y'all Try her if you want to.

Jacquelyn: 1:12:12

I'm not, I am not.

Jenelle: 1:12:15

Yeah, listen, it is fun. Oh, I'll be in. No, I'm not telling them the story about when you say body slam me. I'm not gonna put you in your sense on blast about being body slammed in a session. I will not. I will not. But listeners. So y'all know I do not yet have the discipline for any mixed martial arts. Nothing, not, nothing, nothing. I am not disciplined enough, I do not have the restraint, I do not have the temperament, I'm not built for it. Yet we're not gonna talk about your sensei body slamming me. What I'm gonna talk about is me being asleep in her guest room. Y'all, she be in there getting busy. She turn on the music and she be in there Kss, kss, kss. I'll be like, oh, she's a killer. She be in there getting it. Yeah, it's impressive.

Jenelle: 1:13:14

Oh my gosh Heating that bag up. Anywho she's very regular. It's very, it's very, it's very awesome. I love it. So you have your prayer, you have your meditations, you have your daily movement workout. What else I?

Jacquelyn: 1:13:34

love writing and whether it's short or long, whether I keep it or toss it out, putting the pencil, I love old school pencil. It is so hilarious. I love old school number two pencil with that kindergarten eraser.

Jenelle: 1:13:57

The good eraser not these gummy joints that they own. What is that? What even is that Like? Why we used to call these when we were kids that would be the bad eraser, the ones that are gummy. But why are all erasers being made in this format? Like who do I talk to? Who started creating these? Why are they this way? Why do they smear? The lead. Like it doesn't erase, Like what is this? What is this nonsense? It offends me actually, Anything.

Jacquelyn: 1:14:30

Right, but yeah, those are some of the things. But my normal daily routine is that prayer, gratitude, meditation and whatever body movement.

Jenelle: 1:14:44

Okay, well, I'm gonna start wrapping this up because otherwise we'll be here for a whole another hour shooting the breeze.

Jenelle: 1:14:52

But listen, I am so grateful that we got to have this moment together and I'm so happy for you in this work that you are doing and continuing to grow and your desire and, I believe, calling to partner with individuals and families.

Jenelle: 1:15:22

I think you know we've all everyone who knows you right has been able to just watch the way that you, as an individual, have cared for and grown through, taking care of yourself and your family, right, and we all love the beauty of it. And you know, being able to be on this journey of the highs, the lows, the ups, the downs, the twists, the curves, the all of the things, and watch you champion each leg of the journey, you know, with such grace and transparency and vulnerability, it has really helped to give people, onlookers, observers of your life right, the ability to see the truth about what it means to exist, what it means to cultivate family, what it means to be human, what it means to be a mother, what it means to be a wife. And I would equally, even though you know, probably not by choice but by way of you you know your husband as well, right, right, oh, shout out to Uncle Pooch.

Jenelle: 1:16:53

We love him, but he's been along for the ride and things that he probably didn't see for himself has been on the ride, the journey, the you know, right alongside with you and in ways that he probably did not see himself sharing or being open to or transparent about with others. He has been as much as, just as much as, you right, I'm sharing of himself and experiences, and so I think that, just as a society or as a community I'll start there when we are taught, what happens in your house stays in your house. You know you paint this picture, you white picket fence, but there's a reality that happens, that people grow through and go through and watching people how people do. That is what teaches us about the reality, so that we're not going into these situations or life experiences for ourselves with this fairy tale. Understanding.

Jacquelyn: 1:18:00

There's been no fairy tale, but it has been beautiful right. It's been beautiful.

Jenelle: 1:18:04

It's been beautiful, but that has been, and I'll speak for myself as, like just you know, as your sister, but also an observer of life. People are only allowed to observe what you allow them to, right. And so I've just learned so much just about myself as a woman, myself as a mother, myself as a future wife, right, like I've been able to learn those things by watching you, and it's been able to remove the fairy tale but appreciate, you know, the process of developing and becoming, and it's that it's becoming right, building that we get to do together together we don't agree on everything we get to respect each other and keep each other front and center in every thought, decision that we are making in our day, to be able to then build our self well and build the relationship well.

Jacquelyn: 1:19:09

So yeah, I will not go further.

Jenelle: 1:19:11

Yeah, I'm trying to keep it in a nutshell here, but I think that that also speaks to the expertise like people, the expertise and the just the gained experience that you have right In creating a life for yourself that you and your husband desire to have for yourselves and your family, and so I thank you for that, and I'm just very excited about this because I know that you have so much to offer people in terms of doing the same thing for themselves, supporting them in doing the same things for themselves in their own unique way, and so this is exciting work. I'm excited y'all go to her website. They can subscribe to your website and if you are at a place where you are looking to create something different for yourself, if you are in a space where you are wanting to implement a vision for yourself, for your family, if you are at a place in life where, as a mother, you want to start redefining the foundation that you're laying for your children and how you move that forward, like all of the things right, go to her website, schedule a consult, see if it's a fit for you. We are responsible for our lives. We're responsible for our own individual happiness. We are responsible for those things and sometimes the world can cloudy that can muddy that so much, cloudy that can muddy those waters so much, and sometimes we just need to be able to clear some of that out and see the way forward, and sometimes that takes a little bit of support in order to do that, and so I just really I know that part of the reason that you do this work is because you want happy and healthy individuals and families and you want to strengthen your community, and I believe that you will continue to do this at a high level.

Jenelle: 1:21:41

So proud of you, grateful for you and y'all. Take care of my sister In this work that she does be good to her, nurture her, go subscribe, go follow her on IG, schedule your consult and y'all be well. If you liked this episode, be sure to subscribe so that you are notified when a new episode is posted. You can stay connected between podcasts by following us on Instagram at fearnotthejourney. You can also join our page on Facebook at fearnotthejourney, or you can subscribe to our website and blog by visiting wwwfearnotthejourneycom. Thank you for joining us for this episode and until next time, be well.